Divorce: An Initial To-Do List
Draft your “marriage story.” Work on a timeline of your marriage and focus on why and when things went wrong. Include any memories of inappropriate or hurtful behavior by your spouse. Also include a detailed record of who has done what for the benefit of your children and/or any parenting issues you and your spouse have faces. Take the time to work on this. Drafting a marriage story is important for you, but it’s also an incredibly useful tool for your future divorce attorney, who will be able to better advocate on your behalf.
Get organized and collect family financial documents. In every divorce there is a division of marital assets and debts. That said, it will be important for you to have a general understanding of your family’s finances and net worth. This would include bank, retirement and investment accounts, equity in the marital residence, outstanding loan and credit card balances and your average monthly household expenses. Below is a list of documents I suggest clients gather when preparing for divorce:
Tax returns, W-2s, 1099s and K-1s for the last three years
Most recent paystub
Checking, savings, investment, or other banks account statements for the previous twelve months
Retirement, pension and social security account statements for the previous twelve months
Credit card statements or any other loan documents (car payment, mortgage) for the previous twelve months
Copies of deeds, leasing agreements and real estate appraisals
Recent credit report
Any documents evidencing any assets you had prior to your marriage and still have (i.e. possible separate property claim)
Recent invoices for significant recurring expenses for your children (school or daycare tuition, extracurricular activities, etc.)
Life insurance policies
Estate planning documents
Prenuptial and postnuptial agreements
Work on a Domestic Relations Financial Affidavit (“DRFA”) to help you organize your family’s financial picture. As part of your Georgia divorce you will almost always have to fill out a DRFA. This document includes a monthly budget of your income and expenses as well as a net worth statement listing your assets and debts.
Document everything. Begin making notes of events that take place, so you don’t forget any details once it’s time to meet with your attorney. Communicate with your spouse via e-mail and text message as much as possible to help you document events. Remember that writings of this nature can be admitted as evidence, so be careful about what you say (and how you say it!) in your emails and text messages.
Change your passwords. If divorce is in your future, you should immediately change your passwords for all of your personal accounts including email, cell phone pin, iCloud account and social media.
Think about a parenting schedule that’s best for your children. If you have children and are going through a divorce, Georgia courts will require a parenting plan be issued granting a divorce. Start educating yourself on various parenting time schedules. There are many options! If you anticipate a custody fight with your spouse, gather evidence to show you are involved in your children’s education, extracurricular activities, healthcare and religious training (if applicable).
Rally your support system. A divorce can be a long and emotional process. Make sure you have family and friends who will be there for you. I almost always advise my client’s to seek the assistance of a therapist while going through divorce as the process can be incredibly emotional. Depending on your circumstances, you may need a financial adviser as a part of your support system.
Prepare for your financial reality post-divorce. In some divorce cases, parties are entitled to alimony. Alimony is assessed on a case-by-case basis and depends on your need and your spouse’s ability to pay. Alimony may not last as long as you want or be as much as you want, which may impact your standard of living. Georgia Courts generally view alimony as rehabilitative and a stepping stone back into the workforce. That said, starting working on your resume and researching what education or training you may need to obtain future employment.
Enlist professional help from an experienced divorce attorney. The attorney you select to represent you can help the process go smoothly or make it incredibly difficult. Hire the right one for you and make sure their approach coincides with your goals. Call multiple attorneys and don’t stop until you find the one that best suits you.